Amy looked down at the letter in Violet’s hand and then back up to her face. She was really here right now, wasn’t she? In this hospital with a letter that looked crinkled around the edges like it was written some time ago. What did it say? What did Violet write that she could only now share? Was it…? No, it couldn’t be. Those kinds of things only happened in Amy’s books, not to a woman like her.

While her mind raced to figure out what it might contain, Amy reached out and took the letter from Violet’s hands. Her own shook from her nerves and she had to swallow hard against the tears continuing to build up in the corners of her eyes. Eventually, Violet had to steady her and help her remove the paper from the envelope. But then it was unfolded in her hands, right before her eyes.

Dear Amy,

I’m sorry it took me so long to write this letter. I guess there are many reasons why but the biggest is that I was afraid. Afraid of what you might think after reading it, afraid of how our friendship would change, afraid that it would be lost forever. I thought at least having you in my life was better than nothing. That I could be happy as long as you were there in some way but that’s not true.

I don’t want to hide my feelings anymore. I’m still afraid of what will happen when you read this but I won’t hide behind that fear. Even if we never see each other again, I want you to know how special you are to me. How I think about you every day. How I miss our time together. How I miss feeling your warmth. I miss all of it, all of you.

There was still one more paragraph to read but Amy had to stop as a sob burst from her lips. Violet really thought so highly of her? Of a sick orphan with no more use to the world than that of a pawn?  She couldn’t even read the paper anymore she was crying so much.

“I love you, Amy Bartlett.” Violet cut in, correctly guessing where she stopped. “With all my heart. I fell in love with you when we were together and it only grew in our separation. Through these letters and on lonely nights. So much it hurts, sometimes. I hope you don’t hate me for saying it, I just needed you to know.

Yours forever…Violet”

“You memorized it,” Amy said in between the sniffles.

“Of course, I did. It’s my most important letter,” Violet admitted before reaching down and wrapping her in another tight hug. “I love you,” she said again, just barely above a whisper, right by one of Amy’s ears.

The admission had a fresh round of sobs pouring from Amy’s lips but she nodded against Violet’s cheek until she could control herself enough to speak. “I love you too, Violet.”

At this, Violet leaned out enough so their eyes could meet and, in them, Amy thought she saw equal amounts of confusion and excitement.

“You do?”

“Yeah, you dummy,” Amy said with a huff of amusement. “Isn’t it obvious?” Jeeze, this woman was going to be the end of her.

In response, Violet’s expression settled into a warm smile, a fresh stream of her own tears forming and falling down her cheek. “Yes, I suppose it was. I’m sorry, you know I’m not good with these things.”

“No, you’re great with them,” Amy corrected. Even if Violet couldn’t put a word to her feelings until recently, Amy still felt her love all the way back in school. In the gentle way she carried her to the clinic or the care with which she attended her duties. In the dances they shared or the way she held Amy’s hand with a firm grip. She only hoped Violet had felt hers too and could now see it for what it was.

“But in case you still need help…” Amy’s words trailed off as she brought her hands up and placed them on either side of Violet’s face. Her heart had barely calmed from the confession only moments ago but now it was racing faster than ever. She paused then and used her thumbs to wipe away some of Violet’s tears while she gathered her courage. She wanted to do this long ago but chickened out at the last second. But not this time.

With her handhold, she pulled Violet’s face close enough that she could crane her neck up and press their lips together. The kiss was tender and caring and had Amy closing her eyes to revel in the softness of Violet’s lips. She lingered like that for a few seconds before pulling back, her love’s face still in close. “Does that clear it up?” She finally asked, with a tilt of her head and a subtle, playful smirk on her lips.

“Perhaps,” Violet replied before leaning forward and stealing another. The second was even better and filled Amy’s heart with warmth, made her feel lighter, made her feel like she could do anything. After Violet retreated, her own smile emerged, one wider than Amy had ever seen. “I believe I understand now.”

At that, Amy laughed, a deep, belly laugh that shook her where she sat and threatened to bring out her cough.  When she finally calmed, she had to take a deep breath before shaking her head slightly in amusement. “Good, I’m glad we have that worked out.” Subsequently, she dropped her hands to Violet’s arms and started to pull her toward the bed while scooting back herself. “Now, come here.”

Of course, Violet didn’t hesitate and let herself be dragged forward. She climbed into the bed a moment later, boots and all until she was able to wrap her arms around Amy and pull her until their bodies melted together. They lay like that for a few minutes in silence, the only noise in Amy’s ears the beat of Violet’s heart and the soft sound of her breathing. She could feel it blowing over the top of her hair but it was nothing compared to the warmth that she felt in her friend’s embrace, just like when they were together at the school.

Really though? Was this happening? Or had the sickness sent her tumbling into her dreams to be with Violet. And if it had, did it matter?

“If this is a dream, I don’t ever want to wake up,” Amy finally said into the silence.

“If this is a dream, I’d do it all again after I did,” Violet added before squeezing her again. 

Slowly though, her elation gave way to worry. Violet loved her yes, and would no doubt stay by her side if Amy asked it, but they couldn’t be together, right? Even in all this, her father maintained her engagement to Frederick, believing this would all blow over and their wedding could continue.

“Violet?”

“Hmm?”

“What are we going to do?” Of course, that question carried so many others that were left unsaid, so many that Amy was still scared to ask.

“What do you want to do?”

“Be with you, forever,” Amy replied. “And Taylor…I want Taylor to be with us too.” The answer came swiftly because Amy didn’t have to think about it. It was the desire that burned brightest in her heart, after all. The one wish that she attached to every star in the night’s sky.

“Very well,” Violet replied simply.

“Very well?” Amy responded, before leaning back and narrowing her eyes. “You make it sound so easy.”

“No one will take you from me if you do not wish it,” Violet said, her voice full of conviction. “Or Taylor from you, I promise.” And in that moment, Amy believed it. Believed Violet would fight the whole world if that’s what it took for them to be together. Thankfully, she didn’t need to. Really, it was only one man that stood in their way. “But to answer your question, I will do what I do best.” 

“And..what’s that?” Amy asked, with only a hint of apprehension. Mostly because she hoped Violet wasn’t planning to beat the crap out of her father, even if he deserved it. That would only grow their troubles.

“Write a letter.”

Oh!

Oh?

“A…letter?”  

“That’s correct,” Violet confirmed. However, following her words, she brought a hand up and began to run it through Amy’s hair in long, slow strokes. Must not be in a hurry, then! A sentiment Amy was perfectly happy with. The motion brought out a pleased hum and Amy felt herself calming under the touch. How long had it been now since they were able to lay like this? Okay, not exactly like this but still. Too long, much too long.

“Okay, I trust you,” Amy finally said and then closed her eyes to lose herself in the gentle affection. The two of them stayed like that for so long that she almost fell asleep in the warmth and the subtle scent of Violet. Amy had thought she simply missed their time together but the reality of it was so much more. She needed this and couldn’t stand to lose it again. 

Eventually though, Violet leaned forward and whispered into her ear. “I need to go find some paper.”

At this, Amy groaned and tightened her grip around Violet’s waist where her hand had come to rest, before wrapping a leg around Violet’s for good measure. “Don’t go,” Amy pleaded with a shake of her head. “Don’t you leave me again, Violet Evergarden.” It was stupid, really. Violet only needed to go find one of the nurses and get what was required but Amy couldn’t stand the thought of watching her walk through that door. She knew where her mind would go, after all. Back to that day at the school’s gate.

Violet remained silent for a moment but ultimately nodded. “I won’t, I promise.”  

“Good,” Amy replied before settling back in. The letter, and the world, could wait. For now, they still had some catching up to do.