“So, it’s been a week now. How are you doing?” Following the question, Ashley brought her cup of tea to her lips before taking a polite sip and tilting her head in curiosity. It was only Isabella and her together currently; however, Ashley’s usual entourage was scattered around them at other tables, chatting the afternoon away.

In the preceding days, Isabella started to get to know each one a little better and, to her surprise, each had been welcoming and friendly even after she had been less than warm in all their interactions so far. Still, she enjoyed being able to talk with Ashley like this because she was the only one who knew Isabella’s true feelings for Violet. Had this been only a few weeks ago, she might’ve thought Ashley was fleecing her for information, either for personal gain or plain amusement. However, there was something genuine in her eyes that made Isabella feel at ease each time they talked. Besides, even if she was just trying to get information, so what? What other misery could anyone possibly inflict on Isabella now? 

In response to the question, Isabella sighed and placed her cup onto the little saucer on the table in front of her. “Miserable,” she replied in an exasperated tone. Each day got a bit easier, sure. However, a tiny improvement on a great deal of despair left you with…well, a great deal of despair. 

Ashley hummed her agreement before nodding and doing the same. “Of course, I’m sorry. Have you been sleeping any better?”

“I’m trying to but it’s really only a few hours each night.”

“Yes, well, as long as it’s more than the first one. No offense but you looked like the living dead.”

Isabella couldn’t help but snort in amusement before shrugging. That very description had crossed her mind when she’d looked into the mirror that morning. In the end, she’d given up and left her room with unkempt hair and red, puffy eyes. No doubt everyone who saw her surmised the reason after noticing that Violet was no longer at her side. A few students even shared in her sorrow or offered kind words in passing. Some even invited her to tea like Ashley had, though she had so far declined most.

“I just…it hurts. How am I supposed to deal with this? The only moments I feel anything resembling peace is when I’m writing to her.”

“You’re writing to her? How many so far?”

Isabella looked away in embarrassment and bunched her dress between her fingers under the table. “Three,” she started before looking back. “That I’ve sent.”

“Oh, dear.” Ashley’s eyebrows stood tall and she leaned back to lift her cup for another sip. “You’re really in deep, aren’t you?”

Though Isabella managed to hold the light brown eyes across the table, her cheeks prickled with heat at the observation. Even if she had spilled her heart to Ashley the very day that Violet left, it was still embarrassing to admit just how much the doll meant to her. “Yes, I really am.” However, before Ashley could speak, Isabella reached for her cup to run a finger along the handle.  “It’s funny when Violet first showed up, I thought I was going to hate having her around. Well, I did hate having her around. For a little while, at least. Now look at me, completely infatuated.” Another pause, another shake of her head. “She’s just so amazing, you know?”

Ashley chuckled a little but otherwise nodded her head. “Yes, we are all quite aware of how wonderful Violet is. She was very popular, as you can imagine.” 

“I guessed as much.” Again, a pang of jealousy flared in Isabella’s chest but it was quickly extinguished by the sadness that gripped her heart. “She’s just so caring and always tried her best with me, even when I didn’t deserve it. I asked her once if she only did those things because this was her assignment but she denied it.”

As she spoke, Isabella shifted her finger to trace around the rim, not wanting to drink yet. She sucked in her lip and chewed it as she thought back to that moment and others like it. “I just felt like…if we only had more time…” Eventually, she sighed, and let her shoulders drop before raising the tea from its saucer. “I don’t know, this was still a job for her, after all.” With those last words, Isabella finally drank again.

“I don’t think so,” Ashley countered before her head subtly shook to further indicate her disagreement. “You wear your emotions on your sleeves, Isabella. I think it’s pretty easy to know what you’re thinking. No offense. Violet is more difficult to read, though. Much more difficult, but not impossible.”

“That’s…yea, that’s fair.” Isabella could only agree with both assertions even if she thought Violet may be further toward impossible than Ashley made it sound. “Are you saying you think she feels the same way?” That was…something. Isabella tried not to let her hopes rise even slightly at the prospect but her heart betrayed her when it started to beat faster in her chest.

This time it was Ashley’s turn to shrug before she turned her head and looked out the window. “I can’t say for certain but, if I had to guess, you seem very special to her. More than just another client. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was thinking about you just as much right now.”

Was she? Had Violet thought about her since she left? Or was she busy getting reacquainted with her old life?

“Do you think she’ll write back?” Ashley asked once she brought her attention back inside to her friend.

“I really hope so,” Isabella answered. “A part of me believes that Violet would never give her word and then not follow through but there’s a fear deep in the back of my mind that she’ll never respond.”

Had three been too much? Would it turn Violet away if Isabella looked like she was being clingy? Was that really any different than what she was in person, though? And, even if Violet wanted to respond, would her life keep her from doing so? So many questions, so many worries, and unfortunately nothing but time on her hands to let her mind wander over them all. Outside of class, that was. Okay, maybe in class too. At least having tea with Ashley helped distract her occasionally. 

“She’ll write you; I know it. I believe it in my heart.” Ashley nodded and then smiled to add confidence to her declaration.

Isabella matched the expression for a moment before taking a deep breath. “Yeah, I hope so.”

The two sat in silence then, each content to reflect on whatever thoughts occupied their minds. It wasn’t until Ashely set her cup down for the final time and began cleaning up that Isabella snapped out of it. “Time to go?” Following the question, she also began to help with tidying.

“Sadly. There are a few things I must attend to this afternoon.” Once she was finished, Ashley rose from her chair and scooped up some of the mess. “I will see you in the morning to walk to class, try and get some more sleep tonight, okay? Even if you have to write another letter.” She offered a wink then and inclined her head in farewell.

“Yes, I will, I promise.” Isabella waved to her friend and then finished gathering whatever was left. She probably could’ve joined one of the other groups but honestly, she was feeling drained. It was nice to have these little chats but only in moderation. Even if the alternative was being alone in her room, thinking about where Violet was.

After excusing herself from the other students, Isabella left the little dining area and was about to take the stairs up to her room but changed course at the last second instead. Just because she wanted to be by herself didn’t mean it had to be in her room. It was nice out today and there was still plenty of time before dinner so she turned and went out the front door of the building for a walk. An activity she found herself doing more and more in the afternoons now. Though, she occasionally paid for it later that evening.

After stepping outside, Isabella followed the walkway toward the front gate. Of course, she wouldn’t be allowed to actually leave the grounds, but her feet apparently couldn’t help but carry her there anyway, back to that spot. It was like she was trying to live those last few moments again or perhaps catch a last hint of Violet. The sound of her boots on the stone or her scent on the wind. It had lingered on the bed for a few days until the maids came and changed the sheets, much to Isabella’s annoyance. Maybe she should’ve had Violet cuddle her bear those last few nights.

Once she reached the gate, Isabella turned right and began to follow the fence while looking out over the town and the river. As she walked, she brought a hand up to run along the iron bars, her fingers gently hitting each in turn as she moved. The sight of an inbound train in the distance caused her to stop though, and she brought her other hand up and used both to grasp two of the bars fully.

Had Violet ridden that train to come here months ago? Was it the one that carried her away? At that moment, Isabella wished she could slip through this fence and run to meet it, to hop aboard and follow it until she found her friend again. But no, she couldn’t. Even with a soft bed and delicious food, this place was just as much a prison as any other.

Eventually, the train pulled into the station and was hidden from her view, finally prompting her to turn and start walking once more. There was still a little energy left in her leg so, why not do some exploring? Besides, she could use the time to begin composing her next letter. The one she’d write tonight. There would be no great revelation or important piece of news, of course. Only a friend writing to a friend they missed dearly. 

—

Later that night, after Isabella finished writing and slipped beneath the sheets to get some sleep, she woke up suddenly to a fit of violent coughing. When it subsided, she rolled over on her back and slowly got up, doing her best not to aggravate her chest further. Once she was sitting, she reached over for the water she now kept on her bedside table and took a small sip of the cool liquid. Sadly, it only provided temporary relief and another fit had her quickly putting the glass down and hunching over to let it shake her whole body.

It didn’t take long for tears to form in her eyes, only to roll down her cheeks a moment later. They weren’t born of the coughing, though. Not entirely. It was more the absence of a hand running down her back than anything physical. What she wouldn’t give to have that again, to be soothed by Violet’s soft voice. Unfortunately, it seemed her body wouldn’t be content unless it could join in on the mockery.

When she could breathe again, Isabella straightened and began reaching for the numerous pillows that lined the headboard. When the staff came to take the extra bed from the room, they were kind enough to leave them after Isabella explained her situation. She only had to arrange them in the proper shape, which was much easier said than done.

It took some time to get the proper arrangement set up but once Isabella managed to climb inside, relief quickly followed. However, even as the cough subsided, her tears continued to flow unabated, falling on pillow and teddy bear alike. “Violet…” Speaking her name was the last thing Isabella remembered before sleep took her a few moments later.