‘It’s an intense emotional shock that has a lasting impact on the mind. It can be the cause of various mental disorders.’

‘What?’

I asked again, unable to comprehend what the other person was saying.

‘I’m talking about trauma.’

I blinked several times. Who was this person, and why was I here?

I lowered my gaze and saw a nameplate on the desk.

[Doctor Kim Myung-hwan]

Ah, right.

I had come here for a psychiatric consultation.

Due to malicious comments, persistent stalking, and an exhausting schedule that took a toll on my body, I had been visiting the hospital frequently.

It wasn’t strange for there to be a psychiatric hospital here.

‘Ms. Ahn Hye-in, you have developed a trauma related to—’

He opened his mouth to pronounce it. However, for some reason, a ringing in my ears followed.

‘Oh, doctor, I’m sorry. What did you say? I can’t hear you well.’

‘Trauma related to—.’

‘What?’

The other person was saying something, but I still couldn’t hear it. What trauma was I supposed to have?

‘I’m really sorry, but could you please say that again…?’

‘You will suffer from trauma related to—.’

It was strange. So very strange. I couldn’t understand this situation.

Could it be that I was dreaming right now?

And at that moment of thought.

Beeee—

A piercing ringing in my ears suddenly struck me.

Ah.

“Ahhh—!”

I screamed in pain as I sat up.

It felt like a handful of needles had stabbed into my throat.

“Ugh…!”

I grabbed my neck and gasped, looking around. It was the room I shared with Carlothian.

‘What? Was it really a dream?’

I sighed as I noticed my pajamas soaked in cold sweat.

Then I looked to the side.

The space next to me was still empty.

It seemed that Carlothian hadn’t come out of the office today due to work.

Since that incident, we hadn’t shared a bed at all.

We could only occasionally see each other’s faces in the mansion.

‘For now, I have a lot to do anyway.’

I had also come into my bedroom late yesterday morning due to preparations for the banquet.

Lifting my damp pajamas, I got out of bed and pulled on my robe.

Today was the day of the banquet.

I would be busy all day, and I probably wouldn’t see Carlothian until just before the banquet.

“Madam, did you call for me?”

“Are you here? Let’s prepare for the banquet.”

“Yes!”

The preparations for the banquet were perfect.

Now, if I could just let people know that I was still here, it would end as a flawless event.

‘There shouldn’t be any problems, right?’

I felt a sense of unease. The dream I had today felt like nonsense.

There shouldn’t be any issues.

As I tried to calm my anxiety, I stared out the window for a while.

Then, something unexpected happened while we were in the midst of preparing to enter the banquet.

I saw Carlothian for the first time in a while and asked him casually.

[You seem to have been very busy?]

“……No.”

[That’s a lie. I haven’t seen you even once while sleeping.]

As I asked this, Carlothian quickly shook his head.

Honestly, while preparing for the banquet was the lady’s job, the head of the family couldn’t completely ignore it.

‘He’s already got so much work, and now he’s got more because of me.’

I sighed inwardly but didn’t show it on the outside.

He probably didn’t want me to feel this way, so he wouldn’t say he was busy.

[Shall we enter now?]

It was the right time for all the nobles to gather, so it was appropriate to enter soon. Carlothian naturally extended his hand, and I took it without thinking.

But at that moment…

“Ariadeline?”

Bee—

In an instant, I heard a ringing in my ears.

Crackle—

I began to hear noise like a radio with static.

Suddenly, my vision seemed to darken.

…….

Amidst the noise, something was heard.

‘It’s your fault… that you became… miserable.’

Ah.

I involuntarily widened my eyes. The image of Carlothian, who had reached out his arm toward me, changed in an instant.

‘What is this?’

I quickly looked around. This wasn’t the room where we were preparing to enter the banquet.

It was a lake. The place where I had died at his hands.

I raised my head. He was there.

With a knife pointed at me.

“Ca, Carl-othian….”

I opened my mouth in panic without even realizing it.

A sudden pain pierced my throat. And.

The chill I felt from the place where he and I touched.

Pop!

I hastily pulled back my hand, which had touched him. It was as if I had touched something I shouldn’t have.

Noticing something was off with me, he approached. The sharp blade stepped closer to me.

My heart raced so much that I felt dizzy.

What is this? What kind of situation is this? I couldn’t comprehend what was happening.

Is it a hallucination? No, is it real?

Is he coming to kill me again?

“Ah, aahhh—!”

I instinctively screamed and curled up. It felt like shards of glass pierced my throat, and my whole body trembled.

“Ariadeline? Ariadeline!”

I heard his voice. Ah, it’s the voice I love. But why, why is it like this?

It’s strange. I had clearly finished preparing for the banquet and was about to enter with him. I looked around while still curled up.

I shouted at Carlothian, who was approaching me, trembling.

“Put, put the sword away, pl…!”

Cough, cough.

My throat hurt, and I coughed as if I were spitting up blood.

At those words, Carlothian’s face, holding the sword, twisted strangely. I sat on the floor and moved back to avoid him.

He kept getting closer. I didn’t know what to do and looked around in panic.

‘Why, suddenly? Why suddenly?’

I panicked at the sword pointed at me.

Tap.

At that moment, my back hit something. I looked up at Carlothian.

His figure, holding the sword, got closer, and the blade pointed toward me. My eyes instinctively squeezed shut.

“What’s going on? What the hell!”

“Ah, huff…!”

As I feared, the sword didn’t cut me. But two strong hands gripped my shoulders tightly. In that moment, I felt a suffocating sensation.

“Get a hold of yourself…!”

“Huff, cough.”

My whole body trembled like a quaking aspen. A chill began to creep from where he held my shoulders.

That spot felt incredibly hot. It was itchy, and it felt like something was crawling on me. And it hurt so much.

“It hurts, it hurts. It hurts.”

I struggled in his grip. Maybe he was flustered, as he gripped me tighter.

I instinctively screamed again. It hurts; it’s hot. Don’t do this.

I flailed my arms and pushed him away.

“Ariadeline…!”

“Ugh, huff…!”

As I pushed him away with all my strength, his arms fell away. I collapsed to the floor, gasping for breath.

Huff, huff.

Carlothian stood frozen, as if he had turned to stone, without any movement. I looked around frantically.

What’s happening? Am I going crazy?

The lakeside. No, I wasn’t at the lakeside. I had been in the room, waiting to enter after finishing preparations for the banquet.

I struggled to recall reality. Cold sweat broke out.

Slowly, I managed to take deep breaths. Blinking several times, I scanned my surroundings.

Gradually, the scenery of the lakeside began to fade away.

The place where I collapsed was the preparation room for entry. A luxurious sofa on a red carpet.

And.

“…….”

Carlothian looked at me with wide, trembling eyes.

He was there.

“Ah?”

I looked up at him while lying on the floor.

“Ah, ahahaha. Why, why am I like this?”

The pain in my neck didn’t matter right now.

I got up from the floor, my carefully prepared dress and hair in disarray.

“Madam, what’s wrong?”

“Are you hurt? What’s going on?”

The maids helped me get to my feet. I couldn’t take my eyes off Carlothian the whole time.

So.

“Is there a problem?”

Like a herbivore standing before a carnivore. Like an animal facing a predator that could tear me apart.

Carlothian reached out his hand again. His hand slowly approached.

And at that moment, when his fingertips touched my shoulder once more.

Tap.

I reflexively swatted his hand away. The back of my hand felt hot from the force I used to push him away.

“……Ah, ah. No. No, this isn’t what I meant to do.”

I stumbled forward, trying to approach him. Carlothian extended his arms as if to catch me as I staggered toward him.

But the moment his hand touched me again, it felt so itchy and painful that I had to escape his embrace.

Thud.

I collapsed right there, blinking like a broken doll.

What’s happening to me?

Carlothian was no different. I stared at him blankly, thinking.

Ah, can’t I touch Carlothian right now?

This wasn’t truly painful. It was a mental issue. My mind and body were rejecting him.

Due to memories from long ago.

I looked down at my hands. Both hands trembled like those of a sick person.

‘Am I trying to find my memories?’

Ahn Hye-in doesn’t love Carlothian. Therefore, the death he gave me didn’t matter.

But Ariadeline loves Carlothian. Thus, the death he gave me left an indelible scar.

As if waiting for a switch to be pressed, the memories I had suppressed burst forth.

I remembered him killing me. I remembered being falsely accused of trying to kill Dorothea and failing to hang myself.

And so, I ended up dabbling in black magic and crawled up to the capital.

‘In fact, I wasn’t going to kill Dorothea back then.’

My vision blurred.

Tap.

A single tear fell.

‘I went to see you one last time.’

To die by your hand. I looked at Carlothian with wide, startled eyes.

The last face you showed me was so cold. I was more afraid of your expression than the blade that cut me.

And as I was sliced by that blade and my breath faded, I thought.

‘It hurts much more than I expected.’

More, more, more than I had anticipated.

Dying by your hand was a memory filled with fear and pain. For someone who loves you, it was too much.

“Carl, Carlothian…”

“Yes, Ariadeline, what on earth…”

I interrupted him in an instant, my voice bursting out.

“You killed me.”

The pain spreading through my throat from the words I had formed was more agonizing. You killed me.

The first time you touched after our wedding was that.

Your sword.

Carlothian, the first time we truly touched was when your sword touched me.

And so.

“I can’t touch you.”

The moment I tried to connect with you, I became engulfed in pain. The emotions I had been avoiding surged forth.

Things I thought were okay because I loved you. Things I said were fine because you, who said you loved me, were lovely, crumbled in an instant.

“Ah—.”

My throat hurts. I scream. I gasped and clutched my throat.

Splash.

Tears streamed down my face. Carlothian was speechless, watching me as if I had gone mad.